Loosen up your overalls and tighten up that offensive Italian impression - and if you are having trouble getting big, we have a mushroom for that.
That's right - it's time for everyone's favorite game - Would Ya Wednesday on Thursday - Mario Edition.
This week we are focusing on everyone's favorite Nintendo game - Super Mario Brothers. Ladies, this is your lucky day - we have both 8-bit and 16-bit versions (for extended play). Guys - Princess Toadstool comes in 3-D and 3-DOUBLE D...HEY-OH!
Mario is every woman's fantasy: he is a plumber so he is handy around the house, he is willing to get in a fight to protect your honor no matter how big or fire-breathing the other guy is AND he has a mustache.
Which name is dirtier - Princess Toadstool or Princess Peach? I struggle NOT to make a sexual innuendo out of either one. And since it changed I am assuming there was a divorce in there somewhere. That could get messy. "Mario, you forgot to take out the trash again." "Goddamnit Princess Peach I spent 43 hours going through nine levels of walking mushrooms, flying turtles and a goddamn fire breathing lizard thing with spikes and you can't even put a warm dinner on the table?"
There is a history of abuse here, but this is a family show so lets move on.
For those of you who are new to the game - let go of your joystick long enough to play along. I'll load two pictures and you tell me if you would slide a goomba down their pipe or let them hit your coin box.
And maybe even let Luigi watch...
Mario
Princess Peach
25 comments:
No. I prefer real humans.
I'd definitely do Mario. I always found him more attractive than his gangly counterpart.
I would eat that peach!
Considering just how many hours it takes just to get within hand-shaking distance of her makes me think the princess is ultra-high maintenance.
I'm with Marie. I prefer a human.
justjp stole my comment.
Thats really all I had.
"Really like your peaches wanna shake your tree"
Ok, but seriously, cartoons? No on Mario. Or Luigi. Or any of them...
I liked luigi better. He has that fast leg action, and kind of floats.
it's a lil' odd to me that they changed her name.
Dude.
You need to lay off the mushroom pizzas.
On a side note, I would totally let Princess at my Peach.
If I was a video game character and/or eating mushroom pizzas.
I'd ride Mario's mustache allll the way down the pipes.
I'm an Italian girl so I obviously can't say no to Mario!
Also, the princess was way hotter as Princess Toadstool. Just sayin.
you sold me on mario.
Ok, wait, before I answer, I need to know one thing.
Does Mario have a penis?
Because those are two very different levels of sex.
I prefer my men to have man parts and be human. I picture Mario to have the same problem in the pants as Ken dolls. Nothing there. Nope.
ugh! no wayyy! REally? let's get some people here!
wow... your blog once again proves that women have some level of standards and men will screw anything that moves... in 2D or 3D.
Man is everyone getting on your case today! Real people, pah!
I always thought that Luigi had it goin' on. Mario is too short for me.
I would put the princess in my castle. If you know what I'm saying.
Mario! I have a weakness for chunky Italian men :)
I think it would depend on Mario's butt crack seeing as he is a plumber and all...
I'd be all over Mario. His little yelp does it for me.
Man, some people need to get a sense of humor. Anyway,since I'm not so into little Italians with porn-staches and no penis or girls, I'll have to choose a different Mario character entirely...Yoshi. Ok, he's a dinosaur or whatever, but he has that long tongue. Err, would that be consider beastiality?
Mario is such a turn on.
I love cartoon sex.
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