Tough Guy

I know I claim to be a redneck, but if I am being honest, I'm actually a big sissy-pants.

I might have the lowest pain threshold of anyone on earf. I could get hurt in a game of peek-a-boo.

Which makes me rather annoying around the house.

One time I hit my funny bone and had to call off work for a week. Which at first seems ridiculous, but how was I supposed to bring the Hospice workers into my office?

For me, a common cold is a natural disaster. Don't even get me started on running out of tissues with the aloe in them. Red nose = Red Dawn.

But just because I don't like physical pain, don't mean I'm not tough in other ways.

It's like the saying goes, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."

Unless you mention my weight. I'm a little sensitive about that. I mean, I know I've put on a few pounds but I still think I look good. Who are you to talk, anyways?

Great, now I'm going to cry.

Do you have a tissue?

With aloe?