Marriage is all about competition.
meaningless tasks can become a contest of wills. Last night at dinner,
we actually raced to the end of a bowl of mashed potatoes - with first
prize being the last few bites of the ice cream in the freezer.
But then we sat down to watch Jeopardy. I knew I was
the underdog going into this match, as my wife is more cultured, she's
bilingual and can read faster than me (you'd be surprised how big of an
advantage this is in Jeopardy. I bet Ken Jennings was the same guy from
those speed-reading infomercials from the 90's).
did not expect was to be completely humiliated to the tune of 15 to 6.
FIFTEEN TO SIX. She practically tripled my score. I could have played
Watson and it would have been closer.
So to celebrate, she jumped up and started singing "Time of my Life" from Dirty Dancing.
Then she tripped, fell down and stubbed her toe.
While still singing.
If ever there was effective trash
talk, dominating someone in a game of intelligence, while looking so
completely inept has to be it.