Tuesday, September 20, 2011

The Art of War

Marriage is all about competition.

Even meaningless tasks can become a contest of wills.  Last night at dinner, we actually raced to the end of a bowl of mashed potatoes - with first prize being the last few bites of the ice cream in the freezer.

I won.


But then we sat down to watch Jeopardy.  I knew I was the underdog going into this match, as my wife is more cultured, she's bilingual and can read faster than me (you'd be surprised how big of an advantage this is in Jeopardy.  I bet Ken Jennings was the same guy from those speed-reading infomercials from the 90's).

What I did not expect was to be completely humiliated to the tune of 15 to 6.  FIFTEEN TO SIX.  She practically tripled my score.  I could have played Watson and it would have been closer.

So to celebrate, she jumped up and started singing "Time of my Life" from Dirty Dancing.

Then she tripped, fell down and stubbed her toe.

While still singing.

If ever there was effective trash talk, dominating someone in a game of intelligence, while looking so completely inept has to be it.


Narm said...

No idea why the spacing is all screwed up, Blogger is being a big stupid jerkface. Just pretend like I did that to add drama.

Allison M. said...

this is hysterical. absolutely hysterical and I can see her doing all of that.

jennisama said...

crying. laughing. rinse. repeat.

Fizzgig said...

even though i dont get jeopardy, one day i aspire to have a game show competition (maybe family fued is more my speed) with my husband, this was totally cute!

ClevelandPoet said...

blogger probably just wanted to get in on the whole competition thing.

Blogger is now singing time of my life.

Love the competitions, ours have become exceedingly more bizarre.

Kyna said...

I'm the Jeopardy champeen in my marriage.

Virtual *high five* to your wife from one bilingual, speed reader to another.

Beating your husband at Jeopardy is worth more than a few measly bites of ice cream.