Tuesday, May 21, 2013

30 for 30 on the 30th Part 5 & 6

Continuing our (my?) list of 30 things I need to do / have before I turn 30 on June 30th today and combining the next two as both are related.  I'm efficient, people!

Thing I should have: At least one friend who gives honest fashion advice. / A tailored suit.

I have a wife that does this.  Now where on the list does it say, "at least one friend who can make you feel better after your wife trashes your fashion sense."

I also have a tailored suit from our wedding - a suit I purchased 2 months before the wedding that I somehow got too fat to wear a week before the Big Day.  I spent the last week before our wedding having the suit let out and walking on a treadmill.  A TREADMILL!  Marriage is tough, you guys. 

Thing I should do: Score the winner. / Invent a cocktail.

Man stuff!

I think we can officially agree these lists are less an honest critique of milestones a man should reach before he turns 30, and more a menu of things women look for in their metro-sexually dressed, yet rugged-acting, yet romantic/sweet dream guy.  That being the case - this entire exercise feels like a waste since I already fit all of the criteria, but I'll indulge.

So have I scored the winner or invented a cocktail? 


I played a lot of sports as a kid - I'm sure at some point I was responsible for a win.  Does it count if I was also responsible for all of the losses?  Do they cancel each other out?  Or does a 'winner' count if it's a really great comeback to some troll on an online sports message board?  No?  What if there was a great .gif, too?

As for a cocktail - it's pretty hard to invent a cocktail that is just straight whiskey.  Maybe I'll throw a splash of water in it and call it the "Shut Up and Leave Me To My Whiskey."  It should be ordered neat.

It'll be a real winner.  

No comments: