So here are the things society (or two random articles my wife found) tells me I need to have and do before I turn 30.
Thing I should have: A toolbox that includes: a hammer, screwdriver, wrench, nails, work gloves.
I enjoy that the person who wrote this article very likely does not have a toolbox. Why is hammer listed 3 items before nails? Who really uses nails very often, anyways? "OH NOES THE SINK BROKE, WHERE ARE MY NAILS?"
And I need A screwdriver? Just one? You don't have to be Bob Vila to know that you need a flat head and a Phillips head screwdriver in your toolbox.
UNLESS YOU ARE A TOOLBOX - AMIRITE!!!!
Thing I should do: Take a road trip. Destination anywhere. Nothing booked along the way but finding lodging where lady luck dictates.
This is everyone's favorite 'rite of passage' for men. It's like Jack Kerouac poisoned the water supply and even people who haven't read On The Road believe in it unconditionally.
I've never taken a road trip to nowhere. Because it's unrealistic. Instead of taking the summer off to road trip across the country to some mystical drug-fueled orgy, I took summer classes and worked. Then I got a job. And now I'm married with a kid.
So according to this list - my office job, house in the suburbs, wife, and kid are preventing me from ever maturing.
I'll take it.