What do non-sports fans do with their lives?
I mean, we watch 162 Cleveland Indians games, 82 Cleveland Cavaliers games and between our two football teams (Cleveland Browns and Miami Dolphins) another 32 football games.
That is 276 games a year. Or 828 hours. Or 34.5 DAYS of pure sports viewing.
Luckily, with our teams, you don't have to worry about adding any playoff games.
But that is a lot of time wasted on guys wearing tight pants, short shorts and tank tops.
So...what do the rest of you do with your time?
I kind of assume there is a secret club that means during big games. Like the Super Bowl isn't just for sports fans, but also for a collection of the World's brightest and best to gather around and talk about all the classic novels they've been reading and the new exercise routine that makes them look like a Victoria's Secret model.
Well, I don't have time for Victoria's Secret models, damnit, I'm a sports fan.
But before I get to jealous of these secret meetings, I realize how awkward they must be. Without sports, all of the small talk must revolve around the weather and how glad everyone is that it is Friday.
So, how about them Indians?