Monday, June 28, 2010

Fresh Produce

I've got a story about a good friend of mine. His name is Tony Romo (editors note: may not be actual friend).

As you know, my girlfriend is a vegetarian. As you may also know, Tony Romo used to date the awkwardly attractive Carrie Underwood, also a vegetarian.

After Romo and Underwood broke up, he began dating Jessica Simpson. Jessica Simpson is not a vegetarian. In fact, she wore a shirt declaring her love for dead animals.

Now, Jessica Simpson looks like this -

And Carrie Underwood looks like this -

Pass the lettuce, please.


Moooooog35 said...'re saying you want to look like Carrie Underwood?

Dude. If that happens..


Fizzgig said...

actually i saw jessica on oprah recently, shes almost in daisy duke shape again.

although, yes....eating like bunnies is a great way to lose weight. bunnies are smart. they do lots of um....aerobic activity too!

lacochran's evil twin said...

"awkwardly attractive Carrie Underwood"

You mean like you can't casually get up and leave a room once you see her? Yeah, that's awkward.

Allison M. said...

keep passing the lettuce for me.

Jason said...

yeah mom jeans on the fat chic!

If being a vegetarian keeps me out of the guy equivalent to mom jeans then please pass the salad.

LiLu said...

I don't eat meat. Just McDonald's. Everyone knows there ain't no meat in there.

elle michelle said...

This post? Perfection.

GoSustaino said...

Great post! A link for your lady friend on my vege choices.

Heff said...

I'd still fuck Jessica Simpson. Now, pass the Ribeyes.