Thursday, November 10, 2011

Feet of Strength

Why don't our hands smell terrible?

Human feet smell like garbage - but our hands come off pretty well.  I'm smelling my hands right now and there is nothing special to report.

Yet think of all the disgusting things we do with our hands.

I cleaned up fish poop last night, got rid of an old rotting pumpkin from Halloween and pulled old hunks of food out of the garbage disposal. 

And?  Nothing.  My hands smell just fine.

Yet my feet smell like a soup made out of the stuff you find under a refrigerator.  

The worst part is how much effort we put into our feet - we wash them, wrap them in cloth, then wrap them in a protective shoe.  What other part of our body do we spend that much effort protecting?  My boy bits have a tiny inch of cloth separating them from a giant metal zipper.  Where the hell are my priorities?

Not to mention - when I clean my feet, I USE MY HANDS!

How are hands exempt from smelling like feet?  Aren't they just arm feet?  And aren't our hands just leg hands?  Most animals have four matching feet - do only their back ones smell like Danny Devito's bath towel?

Or worse - Danny Devito's feet?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't know. How can armpits smell like Fumunda and breath smell like ass?

Lil' Nigglet said...

My crotch dick can get to smelling pretty bad, too.

Moooooog35 said...

All I got out of this is that your boy bits think your zipper is gigantic.

Way to showcase your tiny penis.