Wednesday, February 1, 2012

If You're Happy And You Know It

Goddamnit, Internet, shut up.

Quit whining about everything.

Hating shit on the internet is like some new trendy drug.  Read the blogs, check the Twitters - for god's sake check the Facebook page of a middle-aged Mom and you'd think you'd stumbled into the book of Job.

The internet is amazing - it gives you pictures of in-bread cats, and Hipster Ariel, and PORN!

You know when you are getting your haircut and the girl leans way over your chair and her boobs are about one inch from your face?  That's what the internet is like all the time - boobs are just one inch away from your face.

So cheer up.  Enjoy life.  Quit looking for the next great thing to complain about and be happy for 10 minutes. 

Because life kicks ass.  Most people eat a decent meal, see a friend, drink a beer - do SOMETHING good everyday.

And you know what - if you can't find something that makes you happy once a day, it isn't the internet's fault.  The internet has boobs, and you are all 'FML have to do laundry...AGAIN'

Get over it.  Cheer up.  You're annoying everyone.

Including me.

And then I have to complain about it on the internet.


Allison M. said...

hahahah FML I do laundry! priceless.

Suburban Sweetheart said...

Ugh, I hate your blog so much. And you. And puppies. And sunshine. AND EVERYTHING.

Spacefunmars said...

Complaining about complaining, and then pointing out that you are complaining about complaining? How deep does the complaining rabbit hole go?

Fizzgig said...

this is so true! love it! I think complaining is a job sometimes, it probably pays for shit though, that's what they get!!

the internet also has puppies, and kittens, but they didn't make your list of happy things.....

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ClevelandPoet said...

you can probably even find hipster Ariel porn on the internet!