Monday, April 12, 2010

Bathroom Pride

I use Head and Shoulders shampoo.

I don't know why. Maybe I don't like dandruff, or maybe I'm just really uncreative.

But I also love cheap things. My worlds should collide in a rainbow of awesome for the Target brand generic version of Head and Shoulders.

But no.

They named it, "Dandruff Shampoo".

I don't want that in my shower. I don't need my guests seeing that in there and judging me, or my hygiene.

Why wouldn't they name it something much more user friendly?

When I buy cotton swabs that aren't Q-Tips they aren't called, "Earwax Removers".

Off-brand Kleanex aren't named "Snot Receptacles".

And lip balm that isn't made by Chapstick is not named, "Herpe Lip Preventer".

Nope. Target wants me to look like the stinky kid. I think people would be less grossed out if I left an open bottle of Valtrex on the bathroom sink. Maybe something with the words, "open sores" in the product details. Or a Nickelback CD.

So I am shamed into spending the extra $2 to get the name-brand because of foolish pride.

I'm so embarrassed I could cry. Now where did I leave that box of snot receptacles?

13 comments:

Moooooog35 said...

Hey..my 'Bald Spot Remover' and 'Flaccid/Limp Penis Fixer' products save me $5 a month!

Maybe you have a point.

Shanel said...

I guess you'll have to start buying a few name brand items... what a dilemma:)

Mom Fantastic said...

Or, you could be very sneaky and save your old H&S bottle ... fill it with the cheaper shampoo and then dispose of the offending Target brand bottle.

Fizzgig said...

head and shoulders is to shampoo what summers eve is to a douche.

you cant hide what it is just by a fancy name.

sometimes a douche is a douche even when its wrapped up in a whispy name.

fiona said...

I'm with Mom Fantastic on this one.
Also works with alcohol! I've had the same bottle of Stolli for over a year filled with Burnetts (Trader Joes $4.99) ;0)

Ed said...

I use the blue bottled Head & Shoulders.

Although, I never put it on my shoulders, just my head.

And mainly the one up top.

Matt Wade said...

Wait, so head and shoulders makes you feel better because people don't think it's dandruff shampoo?
Doesn't everyone know head and shoulders is dandruff shampoo?

Sil said...

I'd buy dandruff shampoo under the following names;

Dandruff Destroyer
The Scalper
Maple Syrup

but i wouldn't buy dandruff shampoo named;

Dandruff Shampoo
Whales Brains Shampoo
Poo-Poo-Shampoo (ok, maybe i would buy that one)

The Mad Scorpion said...

Love it. Your writing is great, and I think you'll like mine.

www.themadscorpion.blogspot.com

Good one brutha.

The Mad Scorpion said...

Oh yeah, plus... Head and Shoulders is the shizzle.
Fizzgig's got it right though...

rachaelgking said...

Wait wait wait.

Lip balm prevents herpes??

Then why do I...

Never mind.

Andhari said...

How about pantene? It's also super cheap right? I use it from time to time :p

Emily said...

hmm.....