Monday, January 10, 2011

Hankerin'

I've got a new life goal - to be completely average in the most awesome way ever.

In other words, I want to be the new Tom Hanks.

Tom Hanks isn't attractive - but isn't necessarily unattracitve.

He's funny - but not a comedian.

He's a good actor but he's not going to steal any scenes.

He can't dance.

He can't sing.

He isn't an action hero.

I don't even know if the guy seperates his glass from his plastics.

He's just some guy who is pretty likeable and starred in a bunch of movies.

And now that he is famous? He's not in and out of rehab or out hooking up with every new supermodel that comes along - he's just rich as hell and living it up.

I could TOTALLY do that.

Today's stars are either annoyingly attractive or so odd looking it is comedic. They're either in rehab or the adoption line.

Well guess what, Reader - I am average in every way! I'm ok to look at! I can sometimes say funny things but not all the time! If you were to meet me on the street you would probably walk away thinking, "I wonder where I put my keys?" because I'm completely average and forgettable.

SO WHY AM I NOT FAMOUS?

Give me a magic fortune reading, a mermaid, some email, insomnia in Seattle or Meg Ryan and let me show you just how unimpressive I can be.

8 comments:

Fizzgig said...

being unfamous is the new famous. nowadays, everyone is famous for being average w/all the reality shows. pretty soon people will think you are famous for not being famous.

hey...whos that guy? hes not on tv......!

Gilahi said...

Wait. You're not famous? That's it. I'm unsubscribing. I thought this was actually Miley Cyrus' blog incognito.

lacochran's evil twin said...

Huh.

lacochran's evil twin said...

And, you? Could never be average or forgettable.

Rahul said...

Tom Hanks doesn't even need another person to act with.

He should be President.

Of nothing.

And everything.

Allison M. said...

could you hack it stranded on a deserted island with a volleyball?

Mitch said...

Being average is underrated.

Jez said...

*shaking head*

Whaddaya mean Tom Hanks can't sing!? Haven't you watched the animated movie, "Polar Express"? He sings that song about Hot Chocolate and I don't mean the band that sang "You Sexy Thing".