Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Sore Loser

My company had our annual flag football game last Friday - also known as my "Annual One Day of Working Out Per Year".

For those of you that don't keep up with current events, Friday was four days ago.

My legs still feel like someone injected them with Super Glue.

My back feels like an old-timey car - like someone put a little lever in there and then just cranked it for a half hour until my muscles looked like spaghetti being wrapped around a fork.

Last night I couldn't get out of the couch to get the remote so I watched "What Not To Wear" for an hour. If I could have gotten the remote I wouldn't have changed the channel, I would have turned that shit UP. Give it to me straight, Clinton!

The moral of the story is that you could have a member of the Swedish Bikini Team with a beard fetish carrying a keg of beer and a copy of "Groundhog Day" asking me to come to her house to play - and you still couldn't entice me to get off of the couch and be active.

Besides, What Not To Wear is on.

10 comments:

ANG* said...

"Last night I couldn't get out of the couch to get the remote so I watched "What Not To Wear" for an hour. If I could have gotten the remote I wouldn't have changed the channel, I would have turned that shit UP. Give it to me straight, Clinton!"

amazing narm :)

lacochran said...

Ah, Stacey and Clinton. If you watch it again? You'll see the exact same show. They "surprise" every single person in the middle of their shopping expedition. Yet, somehow, no one ever sees it coming. Huh.

Doesn't stop me from watching it, though. I so want Nick to cut my hair and Carmindy to do my make up. Because, Jesus, her name is Carmindy. With a name like that, she's gotta be good.

blue-eyed brunette said...

"For those of you that don't keep up with current events, Friday was four days ago"

Best. Ever.

justjp said...

This recalling of time is helpful to the unemployed. So I take it that it's Tuesday? Did I do my math right there?

Moooooog35 said...

Friday was four days ago?!?!?

I should probably get my ass out of bed.

Eh.

Maybe when I'm finished this bag of Doritos.

Born with a big mouth! said...

ha!!!

Jez said...

What happened to the teenage boy who was eating a large amount of food from McDonald's, saying, "I gotta get my weight up so I can play football?"

*Cries*

Ed Adams said...

COMPANY FLAG FOOTBALL?!?!?!

Damn, you're lucky.

I work with a bunch of grey beards.

We'd be more likely to have a Company Bridge Tournament or Bingo or some shit.

LBluca77 said...

See this is why people have kids so they can go fetch the remote for you. And get you a bold beer from the fridge when you need one.

Matt said...

stacy from that show is HOT.

not that I watch it.