Monday, February 11, 2008

Wedding My Pants

It is getting close to wedding season - and though this year isn't too crazy (I think I only have 3-4) it is still scary as all hell.

My friends are getting married? I still think of them drunk, passed out and pantless; now they are doing that whole marriage thing? Don't they know thats where babies come from?

I think of myself as one of my more responsible, grown up people in my circle of friends - but marriage? The last time I had a relationship last over 3 months we all thought Christina Aquilera was going to be the slutty one. There was a time that the word commitment was scarier than running into Rosie O'Donnell in a dark alley. But I guess I am getting to that age. The age where every single member of my family feels the need to ask when me if I am going to bring a girl home for the holidays. That means I not only need to meet a girl - but get her hooked enough that she won't bolt when she meets my family. Don't hold your breath, Aunt Mildred.

I know part of it is that I am from a small town and people get married a lot younger (and to their sister - har har). Back home there are only so many fish in the sea (and by sea I mean, "moderately sized aquarium"). People meet and marry a lot younger - while here in ClEVILand we have other things to focus on; like careers and rent payments and being in the top 5 in crime, alcoholism and suicide (Go Team!).

It isn't even that I am scared of marriage - I actually look forward to it. "The Game" got old awhile ago and settling down wouldn't be that hard for me. I think it is being lapped by my friends in a race to responsibility. Suddenly I'm not the one who has his shit together - I'm the one who everyone is trying to hook up with this, "really nice girl and she's sooooooo cute - you would LOVE her!". How did I become that guy? Do I have a sign on my head that says, "Need Dates". Isn't scalping illegal in Ohio?

In the end I am actually excited for most of the weddings. Living this far from home makes it hard to see my old friends very often - so getting us all dressed up around an open bar(n) is a welcome experience. It may be the end of an era, a very immature and hazy era, but I might as well enjoy the ride (and by ride, I mean free drinks).

If any of these assholes start having babies, though, I'm going to put my foot down.

1 comment:

Momo said...

I'll be a bridesmaid in two of my friends' upcoming weddings, and within just the past two months, three friends/family members had babies and two more are pregnant.

I so relate to this post.

Has nothing to do with not wanting to be settled. When the right person comes along, I'm happy to enter the next phase of my life. It's just strange realizing that we're at the cross roads, and we're watching our friends make the journey to the other side.

And they're going without me! So weird.