Reee-reee-reeee-wowa-wooooooooooooow
That was me playing air guitar.
I. Rule.
Anyways this is the part where I try to think up funny ways to describe two people doing it.
Tuning your love organs?
Squeezing for sex juice?
I'm struggling today. All I can think about is getting a heaping plate of turkey and rubbing myself down in mashed potatoes and gravy while maybe putting a little cranberry salad down my pants because I like the way it squishes between my thighs.
I REALLY like Thanksgiving.
Oh...the rules - tell me if you would stuff these two people's turkeys and if not, how many alcoholic beverages it would take to do so.
ON WITH THE SHOW!
Rivers Cuomo of Weezer fame
Fiona Apple of Fiona Apple fame
42 comments:
This week made me lose my wood twofold.
I'd have to be waayyyyy fucked up to do Fiona Apple. Like 21st birthday drunk.
If its 1997, then Yes! to both.
Eleven years later = Hell to the no
I'm with Molls.
Nope. Not drunk. Not sober. Nada. Zip. Nothing. A big N-O.
Rivers! Today! Glasses on! Quit hatin!
I am in agreement with Molls and Allison M. Back in the day them bitches were the shiz.
I'm with Bethie - as an ex punk kid, Rivers brings my teenage memories flooding back (wow, bad pun not intended). Give me a glass of wine and I'm good to go!
river can run through me.
ugh.... ugh.... hurk... that was the sound of me throwing up in my trash can... there is no way that I would ever do either of them.... yikes
Is Fiona disease free?
Nevermind. Doesn't matter.
That's why God invented Penicillin and those cool "cocktails."
She has a vagina and therefore meets my criteria.
We're talking EXTREME make-over would have to be involved.
And tequilia.
I would do Fiona with three caveats:
1. I get to wear my UC Irvine shirt and pretend I'm back in college.
2. She can't cry afterwards. I hate it when that happens.
3. She has to smile at least once.
I'd do 'em both. At the same time.
I think I speak for a lot of people who caught Fiona Apples first video on MTV back in the day not knowing who she was, and were immediately transfixed by her sultry voice and pretty eyes, and said to ourselves,
"Wow, who is THAT?"
And then like a day later you saw an interview with her and she began yapping about saving turkeys or whatever, and immediately lost interest.
Also -- Weezer's music = Awesome.
Rivers Cuomo = insufferable blowhard.
I'm not sure why I've always hated fiona...but I have.
It would give me great pleasure to spooge in her hair.
Hmmm... Rivers isn't exactly great looking, but he's not awful and I'm a big Weezer fan. So I'd say yes to him after about 3 beers.
Fiona, not so sure. She just looks disease ridden...
I love weezer, so for sure would i get down on that.
Fiona...eh.
Weezer dude...uh..I love Weezer so sure!
I'm with Deutlich! Hell, she can join, too! We can party like it's 1997. (I'll wear my grunge-tastic flannel shirt AND my black velvet choker.)
(Too much?)
Dude. Your taste in men is just atrocious.
Seriously.
Now Fiona Apple on the other hand?
I'd like to make Apple Cider out of her.
THANK YOU! I'm here all day!
No way I'd do Fiona. No amount could make me do it either.
God, could you imagine? She'd be sooo sad and sooo boring and "life is tragic" and all you'd be trying to do is stick it in her butt.
I friggin KNEW it.
Changing my last name to Apple made no difference...nobody wants me *sob*
I don't know if I'd do him now (the mustache has to go), but I gave him his first french kiss when we were 13. I'm not even joking a little bit. Check my archives.
If I did 'the sex' with Fiona I would be "Feelin' like a criminal".
I was in love with Fiona Apple 10 years ago.
But she has a vagina, so yes. If she doesn't then all bets are off.
love organ? sex juice? what??? and the answer to your question. no i don't want to stuff anyone's turkey in either one of those pictures.
although i may try your cranberry dressing trick. no i won't. i'm not gonna try that.
Now, which Rivers is this. Rivers circa the first three Weezer albums, or Rivers circa today with the moustache?
If it's from the past, HECK YES. I'll take him and his huge ego. If it's current, um, no. And it's not just the moustache. Have you seen his youtube videos? Exactly.
I'd probably need about five strong margaritas for Rivers Cuomo. But Fiona Apple is kind of a girl crush for me, and I'd need probably five strong margaritas for her too, since I'm straight.
I sometimes feel the way you do about mashed potatoes and gravy...
Weezer dude? Sure. Maybe after a glass of good wine.
I do like Weezer...and yet it would take me several drinkie drinks to do Rivers.
I could slice an apple.
"Reee-reee-reeee-wowa-wooooooooooooow"...
Hey was that a Floyd-Rose air tremolo you were using ?!?
8 G&Ts
But then I would rock his world.
Nope to the Weezer dude. I would need a bottle wine AND a 6 pack in me for sure. I'm not into those type of guys at all....I need some muscles.
i'd hit both of em. fiona is effing hot!
Come on now...
Please show me something that will do that warm and fuzzy thing I like so much.
I wouldn't F Fiona Apple with Rivers Cuomo's crank. Okay, yes I would. And I'd video tape it.
I'd totally do Fiona Apple, even if I have bigger boobs than she does.
How in the fuck did u give the guys Fiona Apple and us RIVERS.
I'll take Fiona with Weezer playing in the background. She's a dirty girl and I likie:)
Gaah, noooooo!!!!!!
Ouch! I think I'd rather bend Rivers over, than bed Fiona. I'd have to shove an apple in her mouth before even considering it but my answer is Nay to both this week.
I shant.
-Him
no and no
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