Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Good Fortune

Latest Fortune:

"It's nice to be remembered, but it's far cheaper to be forgotten."

Um...Hi...Fortune cookie guy? I think you messed up. This fortune? Yeah I know who this was supposed to go to - every girl who has found me 12 beers deep and with an open bar tab. Three Jager bombs later I'm talking to the mirror and she's letting her cleavage convince the next sucker that tequila would be a good decision.

I wish I had boobs. It might be awkward at first but I think getting free drinks and no more speeding tickets would balance it out.

7 comments:

Allison M. said...

Boobs do not get you free drinks and out of speeding tickets.







OK, so they might play a small part in getting free drinks. But, ultimately, it's the guys who make the call. I'll take my free drink and one for my friend.

alexa @clevelandsaplum said...

duuuuuuuude! that is such a stereo type! i'll let you in on a little bit of private information. i have HUGE boobs. and i have had 12 speeding tickets. not counting the god dum camera ones.

these ta ta's haven't gotten me out of shit.

now, drinks. well that may be another story.

Narm said...

Ha! So you both admit to the drinks. I don't think this is any secret. Daniel Tosh does a bit about how girls with big boobs get top-shelf liquor and girls with small boobs get beer in a can.

I'm pretty sure if a girl throws a glance in a guy's direction she can get a drink.

Anonymous said...

I won't lie--many girls DO just ramp up the sex appeal for free drinks. But, if the guy is willing to pay for them, then that's his fault, right? Like what Allison said. So who's to blame?

Anonymous said...

Boobs get me drinks but not out of speeding tickets. Tears get me out of those as well as pictures of my nieces and nephew. I got out of a speeding ticket when Ally was born and used Joe's christening as an excuse for another.

Emma said...

I haven't gotten out of speeding tickets or any free drinks. Am I doing it wrong?

Narm said...

Angela - I can't argue that. I still shell out the money - its like a Peanuts cartoon - Lucy keeps holding that football and I keep thinking this time she won't pull it away.

Jenn - yea...it was the tears...not that push up bra.

Emma - I'm not sure there is an exact science to it. I think you would have to ask one of the ladies that question.