Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Top 5 Candy Bars

1. Reece's Peanut Butter Cups - Is there any debate? Sure they lose points because they are gone in two bites - but those two bites are better than that time that girl was trying to squeeze past me in an airplane and I accidentally touched her boob. Come to think of it, Reece's Peanut Butter Cups are a lot like boobs...only better. You can have your D-Cups - give me some P-Cups.

2. Snickers - While not as tastetacular as the P-Cups above, the Snickers provide the most bang for your buck. They are the thrifty choice for your penny-pinching candy eaters. Bonus points for great commercials that bring joy to the the world.

3. Kit-Kat - The Kit-Kat lost points for lack of belly satisfaction. If I had a never-ending supply of Kit-Kats they would definitely beat out the Snickers - but if I have a dollar and I'm standing in line at the grocery store needing a sugar fix it just doesn't satisfy my fat kid needs - don't judge me, Reader - give me a break.

4. 3 Musketeers - I had planned on including 3 Musketeers for the fact that it contained nougat. And the word nougat is hilarious. Say it - nougat. I picture a candy bar version of Ted Nugent playing a tiny guitar. Ted Nougat would rock. Ok back on topic - Wiki told me that the 3 Musketeer does not actually contain nougat so now it makes the list because it has a shiny wrapper and I like shiny things.

5. M&M's - Melt in your mouth, not in your hands? More like Melts my heart, not in my hands. Ok, not really - M&M's are good - but I'm not going to shank a homeless guy if I see him with a bag like I would the P-Cups. When you are sitting in front of the vending machine at work and you need something that is going to last longer than Miley Cyrus' career M&M's are the way to go.

I realize I am going to get ripped apart for not including Butterfingers but I gotta say - they just don't do it for me. They get stuck in my teeth and just don't give me the warm, fatty goodness of the others on the list. Also - I know M&M's are not technically a candy BAR - but I choose to not be prejudice and allow all chocolate candies live together in perfect harmony.

You know the drill - lets hear your top 5. The only rule is that it must contain chocolate.


Anonymous said...

1. Payday
2. Twix
3. Snickers
4. 100 Grand Bar
5. Reese's

Excuse me, I have to the local market now and get my sugar fix taken care of.

Damn it.

Mel said...

1. Reese's Pieces - the same concept as M&M's, but with peanut butter. Mmmm.
2. Mounds - DARK chocolate and coconut. What a combo!
3. Hershey's chocolate with almonds - 'nuff said.
4. Take 5 - FIVE ingredients, including pretzels. OMG, mouth orgasm!
5. Moon Pies - if they are not a candy bar, they certainly should be. Nuke one in a microwave and you have the best of all God's creations.

moooooog35 said...

My top 5 includes any candy that would kill someone allergic to peanuts.

The sooner we get rid of these people, the sooner my daughter can take a f*cking cup cake in her lunch.

Lauren said...

I think we were meant to be friends. First off, Peanut Butter Cups are the tops. Easily the most delicious candy out there. Remember those "there's no wrong way to eat a Reece's" commercials? I do. I eat around the edge first, leaving the delicious peanut butter for last. Yeah, i'm a bit weird.

Reason number two? That Snickers commercial is one of my top five favorite commercials of all time. It makes me smile every time. I love it!

Three - My list is remarkably similar. Actually, exactly the same. I wouldn't change it. Well, only to make it Peanut M&Ms for #5, rather than regular.

Good list. I'm off to the supermarket for chocolate.

-A said...

You didn't specifiy which kind of M&Ms. Given the wide variety, I think we'd all like to hear your favorite.

1. Take 5 - oh so good. It's like a chocolate covered pretzel on steroids.
2. M&Ms - of the peanut variety
3. 3 Musketeers - when you need something a little lighter
4. 100 Grand - a little crunch with my chocolate is always welcome, so long as it was intended
5.Reese's Pieces - I'm with mel on this one. I like to think they are better than P-cups because they have a candy coating too...mmm...

Maura said...

1. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups
2. Milky Way Midnight (also nougat)
3. Peanut M&M's
4. KitKat
5. Snickers

lacochran said...

1. Peanut M&Ms.
2. Kit Kat.
3. 100 Grand Bar.
4. Rolos.
5. Chocolate Sparkle Rainbows.

Okay that last one doesn't exist but if it did, it would totally be a top seller and on my top 5!

surviving myself said...

1) Take 5. Dude it's the best, seriously.

2) Twix

3) Peanut M&M's

4) Reece's Stix - better than the cups.

5) Kit Kat

I think butterfinger is wayyy overrated.

GMan said...

1. Snickers
2. Reese's Peanut Butter Cup
3. 100 Grand
4. Milky Way
5. Twix

I agree whole heartedly with moooooog35!

rs27 said...

Where are the stupid Nutrigrain people yelling for their bar?

Nutrigrain is not a candy bar, get it out of my face! Ahem.

I agree with this list except I can't eat peanuts, but when I could it was the tops. Wait Lauren just said "the tops"? I demand royalties!

Please keep me away from mooooog for living reasons.

Julie_Gong said...

1. Reese's
2. Peanut Butter Twix
3. Whatcamacallit (not spelled right but i don't really care)
4. twizzlers
5. Peanut M&M's

Anonymous said...

1. Hershey Bar
2. 3 Musketeer
3. 100 grand
4. Kit Kat
5. Riesen's

too bad i just got 3\$1 McD cookies or I'd go get some mroe delish chocolate.
good list nom!

Alexa said...

1. take 5 (best EVER)
2. peanut m & m's
3. raisinets
4. snickers
5. reese's peanut butter cup

btw. do you know what nougat is? lol

Emma said...

NOUGAT. It's almost as fun to say as Rhubarb.

1. M&M's-- best when frozen.
2. Kit Kat
3. Milky Way-- also best when frozen.
4. 3 Musketeers
5. Twix

Narm said...

Give Em Hell Harry - Your dentist is going to be pissed

Mel - mouthgasm? me likey

Moooooog35 - run rs27! RUN!

Lauren - have you seen those shirts that say, "There's no wrong way to eat a Rhesus"?

-A - My favorite are the peanut M&M's but I think we can all agree there is a time and place for the orginal

Maura - I went through a Milky Way phase back in the 90's. They are definitely delicious

Lacochran - I was going to ask what a rainboy tasted like but then I got a pack of Skittles and remembered.

Surviving Myself - glad you agree on the Butterfinger - screw the Simpsons and their failed attempts to sway my sweet tooth.

Gman - You are teaming up with Moooooog35? rs27! They are multiplying and they are organized.

rs27 - nutrigrain bars aren't even in the same family tree as candy bars.

Julie_Gong - Twizzlers don't have chocolate but I'll let it slide because you had Peanut Butter Twix which I forgot about

Libby Marie - I can't pull out of McDonald's without one of those parfait things so I've never gotten the cookies - I might have to give them a taste

Alexa - I prefer to not know - kind of like what hot dogs are made from

Emma - I might need to make a new list of best frozen candies - Snickers still gets my vote.

Joanna M said...

1. Reese's PB Cups
2. Reese's PB Cups
3. Reese's PB Cups
4. Reese's PB Cups
5. Reese's PB Cups

I can't help it if I like what I like!

jeannine rich said...

well hello there Jeff. you might remember me as a former MU student making frequent visits to a Ken Buckley. so when i still had the good book...facebook that is...i discovered this here blog. it's hilarious, but i must say i like this version of the snickers commercial for the gratuitous close-ups

Jenn said...

Are M&Ms really candy bars?

1. Reese's peanut butter cups (also not a bar)
2. Peanut M&Ms (ditto)
3. Snickers
4. Twix
5. Kit Kat

The Alleged Ringleader said...

I'm ALL OVER Reeses and Kit Kat's. I usually never know what to get so I just get both since neither will satisfy on its own.
BTW I still think you had the best comment to RS27 in his contest.

the almost right word said...

mmm. chocolate.

1. reese's pieces
2. milky way midnight
3. snickers
4. twix
5. 3 musketeers

you gotsta try that milky way midnight if you like dark chocolate!

LadyShay said...

1. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups
2. Twix
3. 3 Musketeers
4. Milky Way
5. 100 Grand

Andrew said...

I love that you put M&Ms as a candy bar! I have this argument all the time, I stand to reason that they are. They should not be discriminated. That being said:

1. M&Ms - Regular
2. M&Ms - Peanut Butter
3. M&Ms - Crispy
4. M&Ms - Peanut
5. M&Ms - Mint