Monday, December 22, 2008

Down With Brown

I'm down with brown.

RS27 - please stop raising the roof - I don't mean Indian people.

I mean the color brown.

People are always talking about blue skies and green pastures - and brown gets shit.

In fact, brown doesn't even have the same rights as the other colors of the rainbow. I get why the rainbow doesn't have white or black in it - those two colors are the extremes of the color scale - but brown? No brown in the rainbow at all? Seems a little racist, Roy G. Biv.

But that isn't what burns my ass. What burns my ass is the color 'tan'.

Please explain to me the characteristics of tan that make it anything other than 'light brown'. If I were an extremely good looking alient and I came to you and said, "I have researched your culture and understand everything except for Brittney Spears being famous even though she is mediocre at singing, dancing and looking hot - oh and what 'tan' means."

You would say, "Tan is just like a light brown."

You can't say that about any other colors. You can't describe blue or red or green. Sorry, color-blind people, but this is why you aren't allowed to vote.

So when I am at the mall shopping for pants and the worker says, "Do you want them in black, or tan?" Don't be offended if I knock her out.

Because we all know that with my skin tone I need the khaki.


19 comments:

Fizzgig said...

my clothes are brown or black. its a nice color, it goes with everything!

Maxie said...

pink is light red.

lacochran said...

Don't get me started on puce. Could they pick a more disgusting name?

Arjewtino said...

Try explaining that to my first car, a teal Hyundai Excel.

Teal.

surviving myself said...

Maxie is a genius.

Himbo said...

I'm a lighter shade of brown, AND I tan in the summer. Does that mean, in the summer, my skin is tan-tan? or perhaps dark-tan? Maybe Cafe con Leche? Or I guess that would really be Cafe con Pocita Leche.

LBluca77 said...

I am down with brown...light brown

Deutlich said...

I would say tan is like a dark white.

Kellie said...

I like brown b/c that is the color of my eyes. Shit brown. Pretty image, eh?

Christina_the_wench said...

I getting you a color wheel for Christmas. You're welcome.

Alexa said...

i prefer taupe to tan thank you very much.

rs27 said...

Raise the roof? What year is this? 1996? I did the cabbage patch.

Much more timely.

Angela said...

What about chartreuse or aubergine or ochre?!

Haha

Douchegirl said...

what about Fuchsia? It gets no love from anyone. Most people call it "Hot pink"

Matt said...

I like "tan" lines...

fiona said...

Ecru, very fashionable colour choice for "tights" back in the day.

TishTash said...

You should direct all color naming complaints to Crayola. It's probably their fault.

Marie said...

Brown is awesome. Why? Because I have brown hair and brown eyes. That is why.

Oh and violet would look fabulous on you. :)

moooooog35 said...

Caca is the color brown, FYI.

Oh..you said 'khaki.'

Nevermind.