Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Random Thoughts 12/16/08

Why is it that no matter what I do to my white t-shirts - they always shrink and get super short. Is there some sort of crazy technology that doesn't effect the width of a shirt and only the length? And why have we not applied this to mini skirts? It would help transform a respectable girl into a slutty with nice and easy baby steps.

Can I get a final ruling on the word, "murse"? Is it a male nurse or a man purse? Both are equally funny and I find myself staring at the ceiling in bed wondering, hoping and wishing for a resolution to this problem.

I can't roll my r's - which is fine because I have about as good a chance of learning another language as Marissa Miller does having me return her phone calls. But what if I was some little Mexican kid and I couldn't roll my r's? What then? Do they just get shunned from their families and labeled a disgrace? Is it like rednecks that can't drop the g on ing sound?

G.I. Joe told me that knowing is half the battle. That seems like a disproportionate percentage. I love pie charts and all; but 50% of the battle towards "knowing"? You can have your 50% "knowing" and I'll take 50% "huge guns" and we'll see who wins.

25 comments:

Deutlich said...

you sure as hell ARE random. ha!

Hex said...

I prefer to call them "mocketbooks" -- which avoids said confusion.

Bethie said...

I am no laundry expert. I regularly shrink or tear holes in items trying to get them clean. However is it possible you are "outgrowing" said shirts? I have seen this happen to men...

Murse = man purse, just as Moobs = man boobs.

The same r-rolling thought has occurred to me in the past and factored largely into my decision to take German rather than Spanish in high school. I can't roll my tongue or do a cartwheel either. That's just how I don't roll.

Ashley said...

murse = male nurse. at least that's what I've always assumed.

I LOVE the idea of rednecks being shunned for pronouncing the g...it may actually be true.

Chocobo said...

Hey, I'll take 50% knowing and the other 50% big guns. Then we'll see who wins, smart guy. Yeah, that's right, I can math.

Ben said...

This was a fine post indeed. Who says you have to have a point to make or a theme? LOSERS, that's who!

fiona said...

T-shirts, stop washing on hot. Cold wash will stop the shrinking.
Murse - man curse. Deal with it
Rolling R's- it's genetic. I know this. I am Scottish.rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
Knowing - If I know 50% then chances are I know about your "huge guns" ( I am assuming you are referring to your Testicles?) and can therefor take measures to protect myself from them!

The Maiden Metallurgist said...

The T-shirt problem has been solved so I'll skip it.

Murse = man purse. No contest.

Josh can't roll his 'r's either, but thinks he can and does it all the time. Drives me nuts.

I'll take big guns any day. Rowrr.

dmb5_libra said...

the other half is fighting the battle!

i can't believe you haven't figured this out yet...

Jamie said...

I also am Scottish, and I cannot roll my Rrrrrrrrrrs.

I think that you just need to do more tongue exercise.

heh.

Kellie said...

Man purse, totally.
And...
Big guns, big guns, big guns! Rrrrrrr!!!!!

fiona said...

@Jamie - yer abnormal! LOL

Gilahi said...

This could bring a whole new level of meaning to Gerry & The Pacemakers' "Ferry Across The Mersey". A couple of little spelling changes....

moooooog35 said...

I'll take "huge guns in miniskirts" for 100, Alex.

stealthnerd said...

I would like to counter your G.I. Joe comment:

If knowing is half the battle and the team in the know KNOWS where the other team (with the guns) is, they may have the advantage. B/c small guns and tainting the water supply with laxatives almost always beats big buns and not knowing where the enemy is.

Just sayin.

Marie said...

The real issue here is do you have a man purse and is that why you are asking what murse is specifically?

Alexa said...

interesting - i think both murse uses are appropriate. maybe you should set up a poll.

i can't roll my are for shit, i'm good at faking it though when i talk en espanol. what i can't do is just sit there an be like

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrriba!

rs27 said...

rolling rs are fun.

Guadalajarrrrra, bitches.

Matt said...

I think we all have alot to learn from GI Joe.

the Cobra's will never win.

lacochran said...

I wouldn't worry too much about Joe. 93% of all statistics are made up.

Poetry Sue said...

murse.. male nurse carrying a purse: Check out that Murse and his Gucci murse.

shudder

Maxie said...

I think you need to use context clues when it comes to murse.

LBluca77 said...

Whoa, hold the phone!! Do you actually have a purse? I have always thought that men should have purses because honestly you have as much shit to put in them as girls do.

Douchegirl said...

As a Spanish speaking person I can tell you that yes, Spanish people who can't roll their R's are made fun of.

Murse = man purse.

andrea said...

Murse = male nurse.