Monday, January 12, 2009

Nomina, Ted

Big news here at White-Collar Redneck - I've been nominated for "Funniest Blog" in the 20-Something Bloggers network. Obviously I'm honored that my Mom would take the time to nominate me enough times to get my name on the list. Thanks Momina Nomina!

I realize that with the Democrats crazy huge advertising budget and the liberal media's agenda I will never win - but I've decided to bring in a radical, smoking hot Vice President candidate to excite the base - Elisha Cuthbert.



In other words - a vote for me is a vote for boobies. Blond haired, sexy boobies. I mean your other candidates are Surviving Myself (an old guy) and Your Beard Is Good who is brown. And when was the last time a brown guy won an election? There are other people nominated but some of them are Canadian (gross), a Hater, or any number of other horrible, terrible things.

I was also featured in Cleveland Magazine's Hot Blogs. I assume the Hot thing is mostly because of that picture of Elisha Cuthbert (a vote for Narm is a vote for boobies - is it catching on yet? I'm a maverick). My friends now refer to me as a "Prominent Cleveland Blogger" which is a lot like being called "a loser" but with bigger words.

Here's hoping that all of this showing off distracted you from noticing I didn't write a real post today.

27 comments:

Moooooog35 said...

You have boobies?

Anonymous said...

You've got my vote.

canadian preTzel said...

i was going to vote for you until i read that you think canadians are gross. :P

Ben said...

ELISHA CUTHBERT IS CANADIAN, YOU PUTZ!

That means she's clearly MY co-candidate.

We're going to kick the aboot out of your howse, eh?

Actually...we'll let you have it because we're polite and kind-hearted like that.

Maxie said...

are you KIDDING ME? A vote for you is a vote for boobies... I have real boobies! You are just borrowing someone elses.

alexa @clevelandsaplum said...

i still hate you for the cleveland magazine thing. bitter.

Heff said...

After seeing that jpg, I've got a Monday Post of my own !

Fizzgig said...

I think that you are being sexist, and you should also include some man candy to win the girls vote. I'm just sayin. I'll still vote, but a little bribery is always appreciated.

Unknown said...

Dude, I'm only 85. That's not that old.

Poetry Sue said...

You got my vote Narm.

Anonymous said...

I remember her from when she was a kid on the show Popular Mechanics for Kids and now look at her.

Her mechanics are pretty popular.

That was lame.

I'm sorry.

fiona said...

I tried to vote for your boobies but it won't let me...I think I'm to old :-(

Marie said...

You couldn't distract me only because I have boobies too and am not distracted by them.

That said, I would vote for you, but I'm teetering on 30 so technically I'm almost a 30 something blogger, not 20-something.

Christina_the_wench said...

Wow. You're famous and shit.

lacochran said...

Congrats on the press and the nom!

I think you could at least do what the GOP did for Sarah and buy this poor woman a decent fitting outfit. Her suit top is too small and her bottom is sort of wrinkly big in the front. What's that about?

Matt said...

I <3 Boobies.

Rahul said...

I do think it's hilarious that you chose a Canadian running mate.

I choose Wayne Gretzky. We need to cancel out Ben.

Allison M. said...

i'm with alexa. Hate ya.

LBluca77 said...

I don't think Cutbutt is gonna help you get the win.

Mike said...

Narm , here's your link that you have posted.

http://pro22.sgizmo.com/survey.php?SURVEY=U3PQARQ8P0MXHXN1GSND854OER047C-94298-19947470&pswsgt=1231603761&notice=DO_NOT_DISTRIBUTE_THIS_LINK

Notice what it says at the end. Go to sgizmo.com and type pro22 in the search box. You may get only one vote.

Bon Don said...

Can I vote if I'm a Thirty-Something? ...I mean, they take driving privileges away from us Old Bitty’s at a certain age why not our voting right too? Sheez

*Bon Don*

Tash said...

Shoulda offered cash.

Anonymous said...

I am proud of you. And I like boobies so I would vote for you. Ok its more like I am jealous of people WITH boobies, but whatever. Same difference.

MsFreshBananaPuddin said...

congrats, and I just wanted to remind you that Obama was the last light brown guy to win an election...

Angie said...

I'm confused and a little grossed out; she has blond hair growing out of her boobies!?

Anonymous said...

Well played there on the boobies card. Methinks the next presidential candidates can learn a thing or two from you.

Lauren said...

Congrats on the nomination and shout out in the magazine!

I was going to make some witty comment regarding the picture, but it seems as if your other commenters have already done that.

So. Pretend I said something funny.