Thursday, February 26, 2009

Know What Chaps My Ass?

What deems a get together a success? Is it the laughs shared? The food eaten? I think it is the size of the hangover - in which case our mini blogger get together last night at BloggingJason's (with Cleveland's A Plum, Sensory Overload and Addicted to Vinyl in attendance) was a major, major success.

But if we are judging evenings by their hangover - I guess my third grade spelling bee was a success, too.



If there is any indicator that you are too hungover to blog it is making a joke about drinking at your third grade spelling bee - so I'm going to make this short and sweet today.

I have a simple question for you weirdos out there -

Do you share chapstick?

I'm not talking with your significant other - I'm talking your lips should be in a Western they're so chapped and your buddy is scrounging in his pocket and pulls out a chapstick - do you wet the whistle?

Is it less weird to share between genders? Like is it too weird for two dudes to share one chapstick but ok to borrow a girl's?

Final question - when you see a guy fish a chapstick out of his pocket and put it on - does it matter if he shares it with his buddy or are you already calling him a goober?

I got my census packet in the mail yesterday and am wondering why they aren't asking important questions like these.

30 comments:

Christina_the_wench said...

Do you really know where those lips have been? Nor do you wanna know? I think not.

Pass.

Ashley said...

I think it's completely acceptable to share chapstick. Though, I must admit, if I saw two men doing this it'd probably seem odd. But I do it with my girlfriends all the time...so that make me a hypocrite.

Marie said...

They never ask the important questions the census packet.

Nope, don't share with anyone. Especially boys. I think it's because I'm an only child and I never learned how to share.

Deutlich said...

what does that mean, anyway? "Chaps my ass?" Like, do you then use vaseline on your buttcheeks to combat the chapedness?

Or maybe some Burt's Bees chapstick?

Matt Frost said...

There are 2 answers to this question. When asked as a point of policy the answer is "who uses chapstick? Wuss." In practice, like while skiing, hunting, at the bar, spooning, there might be some share-age going on.

Kristen said...

No. Ew. I don't share chapstick. Not ever.

Kellie said...

I share chapstick all the time. Doesn't bother me in the least. There's not anything going on that other person's lips that isn't going on on yours. But also I wouldn't be sharing w/ strangers, just people I know.

Angela said...

I'd share. Unless the person has oral herpes of course.

Fizzgig said...

hell. nah.

the rule is, you have to kiss my lips to share my chapstick! I dont even share with my Mom!

I'm paranoid of catching herpies. I dont even know if you can, but it all starts with the mouth! Right? Who cares, I'm keeping my chapstick to myself.

surviving myself said...

If you're asking me if you can use mine, forget it dude.

moooooog35 said...

I never share another man's chapped dick unless I'm really in dire need.

Wait. Read that wrong.

Nevermind.

Jossie Posie said...

It totally depends on how dirty the other person looks to me.

I usually share with my sister for example. But if she's a hot tranny mess that day, its not happening.

Poetry Sue said...

sharing chapstick is ok as long as you wipe the top before you use and the owner wipes the top after you use...

fiona said...

Chapstick/Lipstick, the only way I'm sharing is if I'm leaving the residue...

insomniaclolita said...

HAHAHA I share. I share.

Julie_Gong said...

chapstick is about the only thing i will share. nothing better than pseudo open-mouth kissing all those friends and strangers.

alexa - cleveland's a plum said...

i think you can share chapstick, like i personally don't have a problem with it.

but it may look a little weird if you and BJ were just passing your cherry flavored chapstick back and forth to each other.

rs27 said...

To me sharing chapstick is like getting to 3rd base.

So hell yes.

with women.

Giggle Pixie said...

When I was younger my girlfriends and I shared, and I share now with my hubs. But that's pretty much it now - I don't think I'd share with anyone else.

Idea #527 said...

I only share with people I know and if they are not sick. It's kind of gross to share with strangers. I would find it kind of weird if I saw 2 guys sharing. With girls it's no big deal, we go to the bathroom in groups, why not share chapstick?

One a side note, once in awhile I feel you and I are in a parallel universe circa Seinfeld because everytime you write about Nickelback, I have just heard them and think how much I hate them, then read your blog. And then today, one of my female coworkers asked if I had some chapstick. And what do you know?!?

Regardez Moi said...

i don't share chapstick. the end.

Smash said...

I share with friends... I like my friends to have lucious lips.

But then I sometimes wonder where their mouth was last?

And then I wish I could take it back...

BrazenBareToe said...

That's a big N-O. Uck, that's how Mono gets passed around. Well, that and the dutchy someone just passed me from the left hand side.

Kelly and José said...

I love that one of your tags for this post is "7 bottles of wine minus 6 people equals 1 hangover" :)

The funny thing is that if another bottle (or two) of wine were to magically appear last night, I feel like it most definitely would have been consumed as well.

Needless to say, we had a great time*

-Kelly

ps - Jose also has a hangover

LiLu said...

Sure, whatever. Unless I JUST saw your hand down your ass crack picking a wedgie. If it was yesterday, then it's cool/

Megkathleen said...

At first I was going to say it wasn't a big deal to share chapstick, but then if I saw two guys sharing I would think it was really weird. So obviously I don't know what I'm talking about.

LBluca77 said...

I have no problem sharing my chapstick but I won't share a drink that comes in a can. I don't know why but it bothers me.

Maxie said...

I'll share my chapstick with anyone i'd make out with.

So like...99% of the world.

Karen said...

15 second rule if my cookie falls on the floor, but hell no on the chapstick sharing. Just skeeves me out. Then again, freed saliva, unless it's mine and on a man-pole, just skeeves me out.

matt said...

I think I'm still hungover. And if I was drunk enough, I'd probably share my chapstick with you.