Well, y'all - I'm down in Nashville for the rest of the week, drinking and...ok really just drinking. Does forgetting the words to country songs but still moving my mouth like I'm singing so no one notices count as an activity? Yes? Then I am going to be BUSY.
Since I'll be in the country music capital of the world - I thought it was only fitting that I ask you, The People, who you would do-see-do all night long.
That's right - it's time for -
WOULD YA WEDNESDAY ON THURSDAY! The Nashville Edition.
Where you don't have to be into emo to wear tight jeans.
Let's see if you would let your privates do the line dance with these two contestants.
The first is new-age country superstar Kenny Chesney. For some reason all the girls LOVE this guy. Being that he is 5'2" and looks like he should be in junior high - I think this proves that girls are just as big of pedophiles as guys. The reason girls never get busted for it is what 13 yr old boy would complain if he got to touch a boobie? Seriously, I wonder what they feel like. In my head they feel like a cloud wrapped in a big happy balloon. Someday, Boobies - someday we'll meet.
Our second contestant has plenty of cloud balloons to go around. She was Pam Anderson before Pam Anderson was cool - that's right - Dolly Parton! I would do her just to hear the random stuff that came out of her mouth. I bet during sex it is just one long stream of awkward country saying culminating in something about buttering her biscuits. Mmmm biscuits. The best part about country people is that no matter what happens we can compare it to food. Like calling her cloud balloons "biscuits". She's so crazy!
Anyways you know the rules - I put up two pictures and you tell me if you would get down on their range.
Kenny Chesney -
Dolly Parton -